Posts Tagged ‘Crime noir’

BLog photo 1

“Hole in the World” 

EXCERPT TWO

I’m thinking maybe I should get some food in my belly, until I hit the pavement and catch a breath of this stink in the air, like Limburger cheese. A real god-awful stench hangs thick in the air in this dirty old town. 

The sound of the answering machine keeps echoing in my head as I walk. And the smell in the air is so bad that I go quickly to the yellow concrete box that is Mama’s Bar and Grill. I glance through the little parallelogram window on the red door for an instant and then push my way inside.

Pink. 

Except for the obligatory Green Bay Packers poster and a couple of beer signs, the whole place is pink. Top of the bar is mahogany or cherry wood—some nice stuff— with pink vinyl padding around the edges. Behind three rows of pink-lit liquor bottles is a mirror ringed in fluffy, padded, pink satin. The faded red walls have little pink dots and bows painted on them. A pink hue clings to the window trim, the pool table felt, and the vinyl tops of the chrome barstools. Sugar sweet, like cotton candy.  

I’m kind of overwhelmed at first, especially after I catch a gander of the aging, poof-haired broad with Howdy Doody cheeks and peroxide-silver hair standing behind the bar in a shiny white pantsuit with pink powder puff wristlets, her lips as big and red as her teeth are big and white.

I sit down and try not to look too fucking mind-blown. I order a shot of Wild Turkey and a Budweiser. The Bud comes in a can, the Turkey in a two ounce shot glass about three-quarters full. Mama’s perfume is strong and cheap. I whack down the shot and shove the tin can to my lips for a wash. Goddamn. Sonofabitch.

The fucking Mosers better answer their phone pretty goddamn soon.

A couple of stools to my left there’s an Indian guy wearing a wrinkled blue pinstriped dress shirt and jeans He’s got swarthy, lightly pockmarked skin, heavy lidded eyes and some kind of Coca-Cola drink sitting in front of him.. About five-ten and a middleweight, he’s checking out a fishing show on the wall tube behind the bar. His profile is exactly like the face on those old buffalo nickels, guy’s grandfather must’ve been the model. 

There’s a blonde, bearded guy in a flannel shirt on the TV hammering the walleyes on some Canadian lake. I always liked fishing; my old man used to take me fishing. In fact that’s the last time I ever saw the asshole—the time he took me fishing—years ago, when I was eleven. 

When you go after catfish in the summertime, you go at night.  Build a fire by the river, boil a pot of coffee and throw out setlines with bells fastened to the rods so you can hear the fish take the bait. My old man always used a glob of chicken livers on a big hook.

We bagged a couple of nice cats that night. I fell asleep by the fire on an old canvas chaise lounge. Then at first light I woke up and my daddy was gone and one of the rods was busted, the line broken. At the time I don’t remember what pissed me off the most: having to walk all the way home, breaking the rod, or losing ol’ Bill. Couldn’t say I’d miss the Saturday night slap arounds so I guess it was the rod, walking home a close second.

(To be continued)

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BLog photo 1

 

“Hole in the World” 

EXCERPT TWO

I’m thinking maybe I should get some food in my belly, until I hit the pavement and catch a breath of this stink in the air, like Limburger cheese. A real god-awful stench hangs thick in the air in this dirty old town. 

The sound of the answering machine keeps echoing in my head as I walk. And the smell in the air is so bad that I go quickly to the yellow concrete box that is Mama’s Bar and Grill. I glance through the little parallelogram window on the red door for an instant and then push my way inside.

Pink. 

Except for the obligatory Green Bay Packers poster and a couple of beer signs, the whole place is pink. Top of the bar is mahogany or cherry wood—some nice stuff— with pink vinyl padding around the edges. Behind three rows of pink-lit liquor bottles is a mirror ringed in fluffy, padded, pink satin. The faded red walls have little pink dots and bows painted on them. A pink hue clings to the window trim, the pool table felt, and the vinyl tops of the chrome barstools. Sugar sweet, like cotton candy.  

I’m kind of overwhelmed at first, especially after I catch a gander of the aging, poof-haired broad with Howdy Doody cheeks and peroxide-silver hair standing behind the bar in a shiny white pantsuit with pink powder puff wristlets, her lips as big and red as her teeth are big and white.

I sit down and try not to look too fucking mind-blown. I order a shot of Wild Turkey and a Budweiser. The Bud comes in a can, the Turkey in a two ounce shot glass about three-quarters full. Mama’s perfume is strong and cheap. I whack down the shot and shove the tin can to my lips for a wash. Goddamn. Sonofabitch.

The fucking Mosers better answer their phone pretty goddamn soon.

A couple of stools to my left there’s an Indian guy wearing a wrinkled blue pinstriped dress shirt and jeans He’s got swarthy, lightly pockmarked skin, heavy lidded eyes and some kind of Coca-Cola drink sitting in front of him.. About five-ten and a middleweight, he’s checking out a fishing show on the wall tube behind the bar. His profile is exactly like the face on those old buffalo nickels, guy’s grandfather must’ve been the model. 

There’s a blonde, bearded guy in a flannel shirt on the TV hammering the walleyes on some Canadian lake. I always liked fishing; my old man used to take me fishing. In fact that’s the last time I ever saw the asshole—the time he took me fishing—years ago, when I was eleven. 

When you go after catfish in the summertime, you go at night.  Build a fire by the river, boil a pot of coffee and throw out setlines with bells fastened to the rods so you can hear the fish take the bait. My old man always used a glob of chicken livers on a big hook.

We bagged a couple of nice cats that night. I fell asleep by the fire on an old canvas chaise lounge. Then at first light I woke up and my daddy was gone and one of the rods was busted, the line broken. At the time I don’t remember what pissed me off the most: having to walk all the way home, breaking the rod, or losing ol’ Bill. Couldn’t say I’d miss the Saturday night slap arounds so I guess it was the rod, walking home a close second.

(To be continued)

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Northwoods Pulp Reloaded 2021 Cover

ebook only $3.99

Friendly campfires and twinkling stars can conceal a vast darkness in the great northern forest. Some say it’s in the land itself. Others point to the people who live there. The raw and plaintive stories in T.K. O’Neill’s Northwoods Pulp Reloaded allow for both possibilities, featuring three reloaded short stories (“Hole in the World,” “Snowmobile Stick-up,” “The Devil You Say”) and a new short novel (“My Ship Comes In”).

“Hole in the World” Accompanied by an Indian guide with special skills, a renegade member of the trench coat gang heads north for his share, his woman and his freedom.

“Snowmobile Stick-up” Outlaw snowmobilers heist a bank during a driving blizzard and discover pursuers other than the law.

“The Devil You Say” A down-on-his-luck reporter believes he’s found his ticket to the big time with his investigation of devil worship in a small, Wisconsin town.

“My Ship Comes In” Two dead men in his wake, a Minnesota man flees to every northerner’s preferred hideout: Florida. But temptation is everywhere in the Sunshine State and soon he finds himself waiting on a remote beach for a sailboat loaded with contraband. Complications ensue.

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Barnes and Noble Nook:  https://bit.ly/3u24Y2O

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ebook only $3.99

Friendly campfires and twinkling stars can conceal a vast darkness in the great northern forest. Some say it’s in the land itself. Others point to the people who live there. The raw and plaintive stories in T.K. O’Neill’s Northwoods Pulp Reloaded allow for both possibilities, featuring three reloaded short stories (“Hole in the World,” “Snowmobile Stick-up,” “The Devil You Say”) and a new short novel (“My Ship Comes In”).

“Hole in the World” Accompanied by an Indian guide with special skills, a renegade member of the trench coat gang heads north for his share, his woman and his freedom.

“Snowmobile Stick-up” Outlaw snowmobilers heist a bank during a driving blizzard and discover pursuers other than the law.

“The Devil You Say” A down-on-his-luck reporter believes he’s found his ticket to the big time with his investigation of devil worship in a small, Wisconsin town.

“My Ship Comes In” Two dead men in his wake, a Minnesota man flees to every northerner’s preferred hideout: Florida. But temptation is everywhere in the Sunshine State and soon he finds himself waiting on a remote beach for a sailboat loaded with contraband. Complications ensue.

Amazon/Kindle: https://amzn.to/3AzETuy

Barnes and Noble Nook:  https://bit.ly/3u24Y2O

Apple: https://apple.co/3D4kb6T

Kobo: https://bit.ly/3isQyUP

Scribd: https://bit.ly/3oskPXN

Indigo: https://bit.ly/2Yo4PeC

 

 

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“Hole in the World” 

EXCERPT ONE

Northern Wisconsin, 1999

 I was just passing through. At least that was my intent. But the car broke down outside of town and now I’m still here waiting. I’m trying to get up to the Great White American North—Hovland, Minnesota, to be exact. Going to meet with my partner Stuart Moser and his wife Ginny, a.k.a. Virginia Burns, and pick up my final share of the take from the twenty-seven bank jobs me and Stu pulled off over the last eight years—should be around eight hundred K. 

Ginny and Stu have been up there for over a year, laundering our money through the Indian casinos a little bit at a time. They buy a bunch of chips and gamble for a few days and then cash-in a big load on their way out. Works like a charm they say.

After I settle up with them; I’m out of the life for good. Get me some nice wheels and travel around the country like Jack fucking Kerouac. Roll all over hell like a goddamn tumbleweed. But every time I call those two lovebirds at their brand new log home in the woods up there, I get the answering machine. And I’m beginning to think they‘re not picking up on purpose. If I think about it too much, it drives me nuts.

So I’m here waiting in an upstairs room of a boarding house because I just don’t like motels. Maybe it’s the memories of all the weird shit I’ve done in motel rooms, hard to say for sure. 

The good people of Carlson Chevrolet Olds Geo have ordered the parts I need for the ABS system on the Olds 98 I bought from a coke dealer back in Chi-town. He took it in as payment on an overdue account and sold it to me for four large, half of book.

This boarding house reminds me in some strange way of a place I crashed in down in New Orleans, a long time ago. I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s the old metal-framed bed with the faded yellow quilt and the military-style mattress. Or the paint-speckled dresser. Or maybe the little yellow Formica table and the two square-back wood chairs over in the corner by the windows where you can look out at Ogden Avenue. If you press your face against the window on the left and look down past the parking lot, you can see a sign that says Mama’s Bar. Next door to Mama’s there’s this little house with a jungle for a yard. ANTIQUES it says in black hand-painted letters on an old red serving platter nailed to a tree on the far corner of the jungle of a yard. I call the whole deal New Orleans Corner. In Northern Wisconsin. In late winter. And the weather ain’t too bad.

But they’re taking too goddamn long with the car. First it was the diagnosis; then there was the wait while they sent to Detroit for a new master cylinder. A rare one, I guess. And now they tell me it’s not going to get here until next week. That one got to me. That and the answering machine up there in the woods. It’s Ginny’s voice, her silly little bird voice: “You have reached 462-3952. No one can come to the phone right now, so please leave your name and number and we’ll call you right back.” After you’ve heard that a few too many times, you need a drink. But drinking always seems to lead to trouble for me.

Most of the time I just lie here on the bed staring up at the cracks in the ceiling, pretending they’re lines on a map depicting the roads I’m going to travel down after I get my money from the Mosers. Sometimes I look in the mirror on the dresser and see too many gray hairs and too much flab around the middle. The eyes look tired. But how can you resist Mama’s Bar? God knows I try, if there is a God. 

Believe me, I know the trouble that can happen. 

I just need to get out of this town, get out of this whole part of the world—not start drinking and meeting people. 

I know what can happen, believe me. 

But you know, time just inches along and pretty soon I just really need to meet Mama and feel the sting of alcohol on my tongue and the heat of it sloshing in my belly. 

And, y’know, what bad could happen in a place called Mama’s, anyway? The more I think about it, the better it sounds. So I get my jacket and head down the stairs to the outside world. 

(To be continued)

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https://books2read.com/u/mlEM1B  (all ereaders)

Amazon/Kindle: https://amzn.to/3AzETuy

Barnes and Noble Nook:  https://bit.ly/3u24Y2O

only $3.99

 

Friendly campfires and twinkling stars can conceal a vast darkness in the great northern forest. Some say it’s in the land itself. Others point to the people who live there. The raw and plaintive stories in T.K. O’Neill’s Northwoods Pulp Reloaded allow for both possibilities.

“Hole in the World” Accompanied by an Indian guide with special skills, a renegade member of the trench coat gang heads north for his share, his woman and his freedom. 

“Snowmobile Stick-up” Outlaw snowmobilers heist a bank during a driving blizzard and discover pursuers other than the law.

“The Devil You Say” A down-on-his-luck reporter believes he’s found his ticket to the big time with his investigation of devil worship in a small, Wisconsin town.

“My Ship Comes In” Two dead men in his wake, a Minnesota man flees to every northerner’s preferred hideout: Florida. But temptation is everywhere in the Sunshine State and soon he finds himself waiting on a remote beach for a sailboat loaded with contraband. Complications ensue.

https://books2read.com/u/mlEM1B  (all ereaders)

Amazon/Kindle: https://amzn.to/3AzETuy

Barnes and Noble Nook:  https://bit.ly/3u24Y2O

 

Read Full Post »

Layout 1

Friendly campfires and twinkling stars can conceal a vast darkness in the great northern forest. Some say it’s in the land itself. Others point to the people who live there. The raw and plaintive stories in T.K. O’Neill’s Northwoods Pulp Reloaded allow for both possibilities.

“Hole in the World” Accompanied by an Indian guide with special skills, a renegade member of the trench coat gang heads north for his share, his woman and his freedom. 

“Snowmobile Stick-up” Outlaw snowmobilers heist a bank during a driving blizzard and discover pursuers other than the law.

“The Devil You Say” A down-on-his-luck reporter believes he’s found his ticket to the big time with his investigation of devil worship in a small, Wisconsin town.

“My Ship Comes In” Two dead men in his wake, a Minnesota man flees to every northerner’s preferred hideout: Florida. But temptation is everywhere in the Sunshine State and soon he finds himself waiting on a remote beach for a sailboat loaded with contraband. Complications ensue.

Northwoods Pulp Reloaded coming this month to online bookstoresebook $3.99!

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Frank Ford is a survivor of 10 long years at the Metropole Bar, where he’s babysitter and alcohol dealer to Zenith City’s derelict class: the misfits, the losers, the crazies, the old fading lushes and “the budding young alcoholics unaware of or indifferent to what lies ahead.”

Writer T.K. O’Neill introduces Frank in the aftermath of his little brother’s funeral. Ray was an addict and a constant irritant. “Forgotten, is how Frank wanted to remember Ray.” The police, who also lost no love for Ray Ford, lean towards a verdict of suicide for the swollen, pulpy body that washed ashore near the port terminal. Frank thinks it was murder, but he’s willing to let it ride. His grieving mother has other ideas.

Set in 1977, Dive Bartender: Sibling Rivalry combines elements of David Goodis and Raymond Chandler with the popular culture of the era to form a pulp-style novel filled with sex, drugs, violence and smelt fishing—the essence of classic northern noir.

Ebook and paperback available at all online bookstores for $2.99/$15.95!

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EXCERPT 4, FLY IN THE MILK

Ever read a boxing scene so vivid that you can smell the sweat, see the desperation, feel the tension? Round one through eight from Fly in the Milk, ebook available wherever ebooks are sold:

February 1960, National Guard Armory, Zenith, Minnesota

Smoke hung thick in the air, stagnant and stinking in the yellow glare of the ring lights. The buzzing of the crowd matched the buzzing between Johnny Beam’s ears as he sank down onto the wooden stool and struggled to clear his head. His opponent had given him all he could handle for seven long rounds but the son of a bitch had paid a price.

The corner man squeezed a sponge and Johnny basked in sweet relief as the cool liquid slid through the tight curls of his black hair and down his bruised, swollen face. All around him, the crowd rumbled. He straightened himself and leaned back against the turnbuckle, stretched his throbbing arms along the ropes and squinted across the blue haze at the cut man working furiously on Al Sparks’ right eye.

The bastard looks like he’s beaten, Johnny thought. Look at him over there, blood dripping down on the canvas. But then, Christ, look at me… the only black men in the goddamn building and we’re both bleeding from the head. But that’s what the paying public wants to see, and you gotta do what you gotta do….

His body was heavy; blood in his mouth made him sick. Legs felt like liquid lead, worse than back in high school football when the rain had turned the pads to concrete. He didn’t feel much like getting off the stool again to face the left-handed Canuck and his goddamn right-hand leads. But the road to the big time went through Sparks, and the big time was where Johnny Beam wanted to go.

He was the light-heavyweight champion of Minnesota—had been for two years. He was proud of it, but it really wasn’t much of a title, and he knew it. Only way to a shot at some real money was by beating better talent. At least better than the punching bags he’d faced so far in his career.

He drank from a glass bottle covered with tape and swished the water around, spit bloody goo into the tin bucket between his legs and ran his tongue over the sore spots in his mouth while old Ernie Callahan applied Vaseline to his eyebrows and dabbed more styptic on the ever widening cut above his left eye.

The ringside bell clanged sharp and shrill.

Trying to focus his thoughts, Johnny stretched his lips around the mouth guard and stood up to answer the call.

Flashbulbs popped. The crowd howled.

Their roar is my engine, Johnny thought; I’ll make sure there’s more of Sparks’ blood to see than mine. If you got two Negroes in the ring, one of them should hit the canvas. That’s just the way it is…

The two well-muscled fighters came together in the center of the ring. A drunk yelled, “Kill the goddamn Canucky, Johnny,” and a cheer went up.

Sparks was desperate and went on the attack. He faked a right-hand jab and then launched a southpaw haymaker. Beam anticipated well, ducked under the punch, slid to his right, drove upward with his legs and unleashed a vicious right cross to Sparks’ cheekbone, eliciting an audible smack–leather against flesh.

The crowd exploded. Sparks stumbled, crashed into the ropes and grasped clumsily, gloved paws flailing for balance.

The cheers filled Johnny with energy. Just like the old days after busting off a long run or making a crunching tackle across the middle. He moved in for the kill, saw the blood and the look in Sparks’ eyes: dazed, struggling, fearful.

Beam’s jabs shot through and found their mark. Sparks retreated into the corner, struggling for breath and covering up, the cut spreading dark fluid down the side of his angular jaw.

His eyes are pleading with me, Johnny thought. Please don’t take me out. Not in front of all these goodamn white boys… let me stay on my feet like a man.

Johnny hesitated for a second then snapped off another jab, followed by a short, hard right to the mouth that rocked Sparks’ head and sent blood bursting into the smoky air, mixing with sweat in an artful pink mist that put a fever in the fans.

Beam stepped back and searched the Canadian’s eyes. Sparks’ right hand snapped out of its defensive position like a striking cobra, thumping Beam’s cheekbone. Seemingly revived, Sparks came on with purpose in his step and an all-or-nothing look on his bloody, battered face. He jabbed with the right hand, stinging Beam’s widening cut.

Johnny held his ground and they stood toe to toe. An explosion of punches fueled by desperation and anger juiced the screaming throng. Combination for combination, headshot for headshot and body blow for body blow. The crowd rose from the seats, howled for a knockout. The huge armory echoed as the referee stood with his hands on his hips, staring at Sparks.

Beam was tiring but his opponent was further gone.

Like he was lifting a boat anchor out of the mud, Sparks prepped for one more looping left hand, desperately hoping for the knockout punch. Johnny saw it coming and knifed inside. The roundhouse left bounced harmlessly off the back of his head. He came out of the crouch and snapped his own left into Sparks’ chin. Sparks staggered against the ropes and Beam swept in, launching a flurry of punches that were brought to a premature end by the dull sound of the bell.

End of round eight.

(To be continued)

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On with the story:

 

EXCERPT 3, FLY IN THE MILK

Chief of Detectives Harvey Green was a friendly, heavyset man who was smarter than he looked and well liked by most. His personal motto was Do a good job but take care of you and yours first. He seldom thought or felt too deeply about anything and as long as the larder was full, life was good.

Police Chief Ira Bjorkman was old and tired and had been on the job for too long.  Everyone on the force knew it and so did he. A recent increase in local crime coupled with the intrusion of the national press covering the Norville murder trial into his previously serene existence had stoked his growing desire for retirement. There was just too much bullshit going on these days for someone who was raised on Live and let live.

Harvey Green let the chief walk slightly ahead of him as they approached the wreck.

Adams watched them come, waited for the slow-moving pair.

“What have we got here, officer?” Chief Bjorkman asked, bending over and peering in the car.

“What appears to be a dead man, sir, who I believe is Johnny Beam, the boxer. But I didn’t look for I.D. I haven’t touched anything.”

“Very good,” Bjorkman said. “Looks like we got another one for the coroner. That fat son of a bitch hasn’t worked this much in his whole goddamn career.” He turned around and looked east along Superior Street. “And the asshole better get here in a hurry.”

Chief of Detectives Harvey Green bent over and peered inside the Olds.

“Looks like this could be the end of the line on the ATF boys’ case, eh, Harvey?” Bjorkman said, pawing at the damp pavement with his worn wingtip.

“Maybe so, Ira, maybe so. You think someone got to Beam here? He’s pretty battered. Nobody ever hit him that much in the ring.”

“Driving off a cliff will do that to ya.”

Green pulled a clean white handkerchief from his trouser pocket, draped it over his left hand and reached inside the dead man’s coat. He came out with a long wallet that he placed on the roof of the car then leaned back in and sifted the outside coat pockets.

“Here’s a winner for you,” he said, holding up a set of keys. “Still got his keys in his pocket. Look at the little gold boxing gloves. Must be a spare set there in the ignition, just got a plain chain. That’s a little off, wouldn’t you say?”

“A man gets older, starts hitting the sauce, there are times he’ll forget just about anything. You telling me you never thought you lost your keys and then found them later.”

“No… but not like this. This is a heavy set of keys. Man’s gotta know it’s in his pocket.”

“Yes and no. If a man has been up all night hitting the sauce and the foo-foo dust, he might not know much at all. He may be stumbling out the door in a hurry and not know his ass from a tuna sandwich.”

“Yeah, s’pose that’s a possibility,” Green said.  “And it is March….”

“That it is, Harvey, that it is.”

Green straightened up and scratched his chin. Scowl lines formed deep furrows above his eyes. “I think we need to call in a professional accident guy on this one,” he said, turning to gaze at the frozen bay and the hazy outline of the grain terminals in the distance. “Someone whose expertise will override ours. The way the media is jacked up these days, with that goddamn Paul Richards sticking his beak in everything, I think we need someone out front on this.”

“You’re right. I agree,” Bjorkman said. “Your wisdom suits that of the next police chief. But Jesus, what the hell happened to this poor son of a bitch Beam? How did it ever come down to this? I remember when he was really something.”

“Me too, Ira. Me too.”

*  *  *  *

(To be continued)

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